Between Thought And Expression Lies A Lifetime

Between thought and expression

Takes a lifetime. Lou Reed

And what is that lifetime?

Beyond the experience of living

Between the thought and the expression that is?

And how do we maintain balance through the trials and tribulations 

And the demonic forces that move into overcome us 

When we are in that lifetime between thought and expression?

Let’s talk about the demons

And reprogramming our minds 

The reality is we live in a world full of narcissists
Full of saboteurs 
And to some degree 
Greater or lesser 
Have those same energies
Raging through us 

So the demons and the saboteurs will be both without and within

And demons aren’t  idiots
They lay in wait
For the fractures of your dreams to emerge 
And for your energy to wane
And for negative feedback to storm in
And then they attack
They move to take you out
And punish you for thinking 
You had what it takes to overcome them. 

How dare you
 they don’t say directly 
But they say it clear as day anyway. 
How dare you
And who do you think you are
To over come a lifetime and give voice to your expression. 

Like with everything else
Knowledge is power and knowing the games of demonic forces that lay in wait
The 5d chess they play
Is helpful for you to not under estimate your heroes journey between your thought and it’s expression. 

Between your dream and its realization. 

Between thought and expression is a lifetime
And our lives in the end are fragmented expressions ripped apart in the cosmos. 
Our time isn’t forever 
So this game is one of endurance and speed. 

But what is in that lifetime
How limited short and full of the rattlesnakes of the soul 
Is that lifetime?

And how rich and vast and limitless does it appear as well? 

It’s everything all the time
And yet we have these minds wired for self defeat half the time or more

Rituals of healing to relive past trauma 
Creating dramas that have nothing to do with the vision of the life we want to build and everything to do with the past we hope to overcome. 

That is the force of its gravity 
To pull us back down to its level

Your history is your gravity
And to over come it requires faith, focus and force of will. Running in concert and doing that consistently 
And not allowing failure to overcome us
But rather use it as the next ledge to begin again from

Rather than a place of collapse. 
To hold fast to the vision of what we want to become
Rather than surrender to who we’ve been. 

Most of us have been raised by wolves
Who did the best they could
But were themselves products of dysfunction and madness

Their lives too take place 
Between thought and expression

And with that line 
We think of poetry
Or high end artistic ideal

But a line like between thought and expression is a lifetime 

could just as easily be aimed at something dark

The demons can win
And I suppose statistically most often do

So how do we prevent that from happening to us?

It comes back to knowledge and understanding the depth of the battle we are in
Or the seemingly endless marathon that is our dreams realization 

And the forces that will come out against us when we attempt it. 

It’s more complicated than just moving towards something we have previously been unable to achieve

It’s rewiring our thoughts
And restructuring our lives 
To facilitate the thoughts we wish to give expression too 

I don’t know your world but perhaps in explaining mine it can lend you something on your journey

I woke up uninspired and in the chaos of this fight

With nothing to write about
So I wrote about the nothingness 
I wrote anyway. 

Ambivalence can be an alarm bell for action

Based on this line from Lou Reed that was in my head
Between thought and expression

We only need a seed to move forward with expression. 

And now I will run to the gym as the sun comes up listening to something motivational 
Something that rewires lifetimes of damaged thinking 

To address the demons within

The thought forms that the external demons are manifestations of

This is the battle of the lifetime that resides between thought and expression

What am I trying to express
And how will I  give birth to that expression?

How do i take flight against the gravity of my personal limitations ?

It’s not easy and not whitewashing how complicated it actually is
Is crucial here. 

The resistance is profound so our resolve must be up to the challenge
Of overcoming a gravity that is the result of generations of dysfunction 

To acknowledge the darkness is not to succumb to it
But rather to understand it
And to face the full breadth of it

So that we can make a plan to actually move beyond it
And the various weapons in the world that will move against us in our pursuits 

Between thought and expression.