[TV's Frank]
If chauffeurs ruled the world
It's what I'd like to see
'Cause everyone in the world
Would take a back seat to me
I wouldn't have to drive
I wouldn't have to steer
'Cause all would bow down before me
In total abject fear
All the gorgeous dames
Would worship at my feet!
Why, I could have any one of them I want
Even Meryl Steep
I'd have complete respect
Of everyone on the planet
Including intellectuals
Even David Mamet
[Bridge]
Tell me, why do I have to take
Orders from this guy?
I'd like to drop him a bucket of boiling grease
And watch him slowly die.
[Dr. Forrester]
That's enough, Frank.
[Frank]
If chauffeurs ruled the world
[Dr. F]
That's enough, Frank, Frank!
[Frank]
Is what I'd like to see
[Dr. F]
That's enough!
[Frank]
'Cause everyone in the world
Would take a back seat to me,
Mammy!
[Dr. F]
That's enough, Frank.
[Joel]
We think your song is
[Joel and the Bots]
Fabulous!
[Frank]
If chauffeurs ruled the world,
It's what I'd like to see,
But I guess some other palooka will rule the world
No, not me.
[Dr. F]
Push the button, Judy Garland. Push the button, Frank.
[Frank]
Do you think the ACE Awards people are watching this?
[Dr. F]
Oh, for crying out loud!
If chauffeurs ruled the world
It's what I'd like to see
'Cause everyone in the world
Would take a back seat to me
I wouldn't have to drive
I wouldn't have to steer
'Cause all would bow down before me
In total abject fear
All the gorgeous dames
Would worship at my feet!
Why, I could have any one of them I want
Even Meryl Steep
I'd have complete respect
Of everyone on the planet
Including intellectuals
Even David Mamet
[Bridge]
Tell me, why do I have to take
Orders from this guy?
I'd like to drop him a bucket of boiling grease
And watch him slowly die.
[Dr. Forrester]
That's enough, Frank.
[Frank]
If chauffeurs ruled the world
[Dr. F]
That's enough, Frank, Frank!
[Frank]
Is what I'd like to see
[Dr. F]
That's enough!
[Frank]
'Cause everyone in the world
Would take a back seat to me,
Mammy!
[Dr. F]
That's enough, Frank.
[Joel]
We think your song is
[Joel and the Bots]
Fabulous!
[Frank]
If chauffeurs ruled the world,
It's what I'd like to see,
But I guess some other palooka will rule the world
No, not me.
[Dr. F]
Push the button, Judy Garland. Push the button, Frank.
[Frank]
Do you think the ACE Awards people are watching this?
[Dr. F]
Oh, for crying out loud!
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